Good and Bad

Photo by AlexandreHenryAlves at morguefile.com

Photo by AlexandreHenryAlves at morguefile.com

Hi, everyone. Today’s post is not a story, nor is it a character interview. As you all know, this blog is called Welcome to My Imagination. While it can be a lot of fun up in my head, there are also times where I’ve felt like I got lost in there too. This post is for those who struggle with depression and/or anxiety and feel they’re alone. I’m writing today to tell you, you aren’t alone. I’ve dealt with anxiety (and sometimes depression because of it) my whole life. We might be in different boats, everyone’s individual circumstances are different, but we’re on the same ocean, rowing against the same tide. Creative and/or highly intelligent people are at higher risk for anxiety and depression too.

Ever since I was little I’ve had an imagination that wouldn’t quit, a mind that analyzes EVERYTHING, a desire to trust anyone that say they care about me or know better than I do, and a sense of compassion and empathy that could be used against me. These things together help make me who I am, but they also can be used to create a hurricane of emotion that once I’m engulfed in, is difficult to find my way out of. It can feel like it’s going to drown me sometimes, and that this is all my life will ever be, but in my heart I know that’s a lie. I want to tell you this today. Whatever you’re facing, whatever battle you’re in, whatever lies are running through your head, they will not overcome you. You have to keep going. This will not be your whole life, so you cannot give your life over to it. The goal of depression and anxiety is to kill you. This is not your doing. This is not your fault. Fight against them. You are worth fighting for. Your life is worth living.

I’m still learning how to handle these hard times, but I want to encourage you today to remember that no matter how high the waves may be, the storm will always pass and when the storm fades away beauty and strength will be left in its wake. With every storm I come through I’m stronger for it. Would I like to not be going through this? Yes. Anxiety and depression aren’t something I’d wish on the worst of humanity, let alone myself, but I know God as a plan for my life and I’ll be better for it when this battle is done. I know I’ll be able to be of use in people’s lives that I never would have been otherwise.

So, dear reader, when you feel like you’re the problem, or you’re the only one in the world who faces these things, or this storm will never pass, remember that life is worth living even in the darkest moments and everything you go through can be used for good. Someday, if you keep fighting, and keep searching, you will be used in someone else’s life. If you can’t fight for yourself, think of them. Fight for them. Find a pastor, counselor, parent, or friend and fight to let them in. No battle is meant to be fought alone.

If today’s post helps even one person, then I know the battles I’m facing are worth it.

Thank you for reading. Check back next week for another short story.

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14 Responses to Good and Bad

  1. As someone with many, many years of experience with depression and anxiety, I have to commend you for having the courage to write about it and express your own experiences. If I may, there is something I’d like to point out.

    “The goal of depression and anxiety is to kill you.”

    I actually used to believe the same thing until I began realizing that I was learning a lot from my depression and anxiety. Don’t get me wrong, I feel like they’ve been an amazing hindrance in my life, but if I didn’t have them, I wouldn’t have been able to become aware of how they affect me and how these things affect other people. By being on the inside, I can relate to people who suffer through the same things. And if I can use my experiences to talk someone through their troubles, help them to see the brighter side of their dark day, or give them a hint of that light inside of them that’s waiting to shine, then every second of depression and anxiety I’ve gone through hasn’t been for nothing. And it seems that you, as well, are at this realization.

    “If today’s post helps even one person, then I know the battles I’m facing are worth it.”

    Keep doing what you’re doing and keep moving forward. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m always here. You can find my email in the Contact section of my blog. Feel free to use it any time. 🙂

    Like

  2. writtenandtyped says:

    Like

  3. writtenandtyped says:

    Love to you Justina. Keep holding on to God, He is good in all things and in every situation x

    Like

  4. Keigh Ahr says:

    The emphasis you place on being used in someone else’s life reminds me of an observation my late grandfather once made — people may know that they’re loved, but what they really need to know is that they’re needed. Knowing someone relies on you is an affirmation of one’s worth, and I think you’re right to suggest it can be a key tool in the fight against anxiety and depression.

    Like

  5. Pingback: Fair Use | The Diligent Dilettante

  6. annapauthor says:

    Justina, thank you for this. Very authentic and very well timed.

    Like

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